Three skills that you can’t get from books Tolstoy had said that the ideal book is the key to wisdom. Books and knowledge have told us a lot, for example how to get along with other people and how to live a better life. While there are still some skills which can hardly get from books. So here comes the question: what kind of skills that you cannot get from books, but which are vital to influence your life? Today, I would share my point of view on this which based on an article I have read on Zhihu. In some soap operas, when a bad people finally did some good things in the end of show, audience would totally or largely change the attitudes towards them, no matter how many bad things they had ever done before. Because the fact that the former bad people unexpectedly did good things had already beyond the audience’s expectation. Therefore, how to manage your expectation seems to be very important. We all should have known the basic formula, happiness is equal to reality minus expectations. When you hold a lower expectation towards some people or something, and when it come back with a good reality, you will feel better, you will get more happiness. So when we are considering how to get happiness, here comes one of the answers: Lower you expectations. If you guys had ever attend the Harvard open lectures Positive Psychology, I believe you would have a better understating on it. More deeply, we should also learn to manage other people’s expectations towards us. Especially in the working environment, we should try to manage our boss’s expectation. You had better not permit them an excellent outcome before you start do it. What you had better do is to let them know which part of the program may have risk, which part you have more confidence and tell them you will try to achieve a good result. When you often do some good work beyond your boss’s expectation, you get the chance. The first one is to manage our or other people’s expectations, the next one which is also an important one is to control your appetency or desire. If a man have met or experienced lots of beauties, he may not feel happier or more satisf when he met a new beautiful girl, because he had met a lot before. When someone have been satisf with large material desire since he was young, he would not feel happy to get more normal good things. They are not as sensitive to normal good things as other people. In another word, their threshold value is getting higher, normal good things would not make them happy. So it told me that I can try to control my desire and not always satisfy my desire without limitation if I want to get more continuous satisfaction and happiness (用中文讲就是适可而止) All in all, these three skills can help us with a better life. Try to manage your or other people’s expectations. Control your appetency or desire. And experience more fresh things and leave from your safe zone. Thank you, that’s all.